Inside the walls
by PunkPrincess316
Summary: Inside the walls of Cloud Strife's mind there's a lot of things you don't know. Response to Kayla the Shapeshifter's challenge. Only slightly angsty.


_**This is in response to Kayla the Shapeshifter's challenge. It's piece dedicated entirely to Cloud Strife, the damn coolest Final Fantasy 7 character in the whole game and the movie/OVA. And as a side note the Cloud in Kayla's story isn't this one, that one's me. Don't know where that nickname came from 'cause I'm a girl and I got this nickname before Kayla even herd of Final Fantasy sooo….. On with the story.**_

Home

Not that he had ever really had one until Tifa had taken him in. That was his first taste of belonging, of fitting in. When he was part of Shinra the only person he really got along with was Zach. But Zach's dead now. Forgotten to many people, but never to him. No, Cloud Strife would always remember his friend. He'll take the memories to hell and back if he had to, but he'd never forget. Never. Friends never forget.

I hate Everything about you

Sepheroth. Cloud really did hate everything about the silver haired SOLDIER member. Yet in a way he wished he could be a little like him. To be so devoted to one task no matter what other's thought of you, well, Cloud doubted he'd ever be like that. When the going got tough usually Cloud got going. At least until he met Tifa and the rest of the AVALANCHE members. They gave him something to stick around for.

Leave out all the rest

Sometimes when he lied awake at night Cloud would wonder how he was destined to live, or die for that matter. How much time did he really have left? There was so much he wanted to do and there was so little time to do it in. As the saying goes 'Only leave for tomorrow what you're willing to die left undone.' But that wasn't entirely true sometimes putting something off gave you something to live for. You promise you'll stay alive long enough to do it. Sometimes it worked for Cloud.

Gotta be somebody

After Tifa took him in Cloud learned something. You don't have to be someone to be loved. At that time he was a too-thin ex-SOLDIER with a serious case of depression. Tifa didn't care though and she took care of him anyhow. Even to this day Cloud was grateful. Without her he wouldn't have the warm loving family that he did. It was all thanks to her.

Never too late

People are always saying it's never too late to do anything. That's not always right though. It was too late to save Zach. It was too late to say good-bye to Aerith one last time. It was too late to save himself. Tifa was always calling him a pessimist when he said that too her when she tried to help him and when she said that it always made him think. Was it really to late to save him? Tifa didn't think so but she had been wrong before. What did he really believe? Cloud wasn't sure.

Who I am hates who I've been

Cloud still couldn't forgive himself. Even years after Zach's death the memory still haunted him. Especially after Zach and Aerith started hanging out in his head. That didn't help his guilt meter any. Even after so much time it was painful to relive those memories. He had felt so helpless and he still did a little. Helpless to fight anything even his own destiny.

If everyone cared

If everyone cared then the world would be a much happier place. Or would it? If everyone cared about everything that ever happened in the world then every person would be chased by insurmountable guilt wouldn't they? Cloud himself was wracked with guilt but he couldn't even begin to imagine things if everyone alive carried his guilt along with their own. He couldn't even imagine carrying other's greif, despair, and guilt.

Who knew

Who knew that the skinny blonde boy Tifa knew as a child would turn into the person Cloud was now. She supposed that being in SOLDIER had something to do with it. Women loved it of course, and chased him because of his killer good looks and fabulous body. Tifa herself found herself chasing after him but for a different reason. She wanted to help get rid of the lost, tormented look in Cloud's eyes. She wanted to see him truly smile.

The kids aren't alright

And in the streets of Midgar they really weren't. Geostigma alone was a huge enough problem and the kids that had it hardly stood a chance of making it. Cloud knew how painful it was because even he, the mighty hero, the ex-SOLDIER, had fallen victim to it's cruel clutches.

Remember the name.

When Cloud first joined Shinra that was all he could think about. He wanted to be remembered. But after time he stopped caring about that. He no longer cared if people remembered him, he just wanted to help. Cloud wanted to be the person the younger kids looked up to, the person he had never had as a kid. Little did he know that he already was.

_**Sorry if that was a little too angsty for your taste. That's what I've got on my playlist so that's what I had to use. My cousin is now givin' me a dirty look 'cause I won't play Rockband with him. Grouch ass. *smacks cousin* I'm Back! Review please!**_


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